we have officially lost it.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Randomize
