I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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