It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize