Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize
