I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
