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her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
