so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
