brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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