Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
