YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize