I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
