Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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