He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize