so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
