well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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