bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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