So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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