so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
