oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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