This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
