It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
not ubering you a puppy
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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