I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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