return my video game
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
