True but thats because hes a fetus.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize