does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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