I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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