I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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