Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If I die, sorry about rent.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
