and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
