he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
