So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
