Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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