guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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