it's too hot outside to masturbate.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
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