Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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