I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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