At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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