it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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