at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
She said her name was "party"
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
