pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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