I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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