is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Randomize
