you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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