Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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