This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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