Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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