I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Holy shit dude........stairs
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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