Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
