Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
