i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
When did angry sex become our thing?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
