everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
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